Clubs and Shots, not Books and Tots.

Dear Gin,
All of my friends all started having children at 15 and all have boyfriends now and since I am married they feel we should go on couples dates. But I hate those because all the want to do is go to dinner and talk about their kids, and honestly, I am not there yet. I couldn't care less about their kids, but I am trying hard to remain friends with them.

Sincerely,
Clubs and Shots, not Books and Tots.

Dear Clubs and Shots, not Books and Tots,
It makes me slightly nervous and scared that your friends started having babies at 15. But okay, chicken. I think dinners with long drawn out conversations about children is terribly boring no matter who you are. In fact, baby owners have a horrible habit of telling asinine details about the lives of their children to anyone who will listen. To us non baby owners this can be like nails on a chalk board if the conversation is one of three things: 1. Too long with no point. 2. Involving bodily functions and 3. a brag story about something very ordinary. For example, "my little person is the smartest thing ever, it just learned how to not poop it's pants." I am sure this shortened version of a typical 3 hour convo, is life changing to the parent. But that's why Lisa Frank invented diaries. Or other baby owners. As a single gal, I would never run up to this type of baby owner and tell a long detailed story about how great it was to go out with friends, drink several martini's, make out with a hipster who's into art, go home in the wee hours of the night to a perfectly clean home and luxurious bed sans baby puke, all while looking cute in leggin's as pants because my body hasn't gone to pot. I mean, I am more aware and sensitive than that.
So I say, don't hang out with anybody you don't want to, or engage in any activity that doesn't sound fun--for any reason.

Cheers,
Gin